My husband and I love to tease our adopted daughter about how he and I met....we have this GREAT story (she rolls her eyes!) "Well, your Papa was plucking tea at the Norwood Tea Plantation in Sri Lanka, and I was plucking tea at the Bogowanna Tea Plantation in Sri Lanka......strong winds were blowing and suddenly (although on different sides of the road) we BUMPED into one another! Well, according to Sri Lankan custom if two tea baskets touch (especially male and female) - they MUST MARRY!!!" "Oh, Mama!! Please don't tell that tea basket story again - how did you really meet?"
Personally, I LIKE the tea basket story, don't you??
In reality - my husband-to-be (Nando) and I had a mutual friend in Houston. At the time he lived in Houston and I lived in Florida. I had befriended Ofelia during a computer class I took in Houston (she was a very kind Mexican-American who invited me immediately to her home). She and I kept in touch (this was PRE-email, folks!!!). One day she wrote "There is the NICEST guy - I wish you two could meet - he is so, so sweet. Can I at least give him your mailing address and if you don't like his letter - just toss it in the rubbish, no obligations!" Well, that's a nice, vague, non-obligatory invitation. Although I was busy career-wise and also looking after my Mum, I said "OK - let him send the letter, I suppose".
The letter arrived; it was very sweet. Along with the letter came his photo (and gosh, he looked like Bambi!). He asked me to call him "collect". We chatted for hours. We called one another the next night, and so on and those were the days long before "phone cards"!!!
After about 6 months (and nightly calls back and forth) we really felt we (Nando and I) were close friends. Sometimes I needed to call him to tell him about my day and vice versa. It wasn't "mushy" - it was like two old friends chit-chatting. He asked me a great favour after those 6 months "Would you consider coming to Houston for my birthday? I will send you a ticket, if you will come and celebrate the day with me".
Oh my, I thought about it LONG and HARD!!! What if he's a pervert or murderer? Am I saying yes to go to Houston to my DEATH? We talked about where I would stay (sadly, Ofelia had passed away from cancer - I would have loved for her to have heard this story). He told me he shared an apartment with 6 guys and had NO intention of putting me up there, but he would put me up at a hotel nearby. Even so, I DOUBTED, but something made me say yes.
Now then - what ensued as we met one another at the Houston airport was a calamity of errors. He had told me he was 5'9" tall and I had told him I was "under 30 years of age" (whew! - was that ever stretching it!!!). So I flew to Houston on the airline ticket he mailed me and there I was at the airport. People went by and by and by and I couldn't find one single greeter who was around 5'9" tall! I was UPSET!! "Oh, he's made a FOOL out of me - he never intended to meet me, period! Best I can do is get back on the next plane to Florida and forget this idiotic mess!!! He's made a FOOL of me!" Suddenly I saw this REALLY short guy over in a corner with a dozen red roses held up almost covering his face. He looked about 5'0" at best. He was also looking at me (probably in disbelief at how much OLDER I looked in person!) - and I said "Nando?" - big smile!!!! I said "You're a lot shorter than I thought" (luckily, he was chivalrous enough NOT to say "and you're a lot OLDER than I thought!).
Nando couldn't drive then, so he'd asked his friend (who didn't have a driver's license and couldn't read English signs, but HAD a car) to pick us both up. So off we 3 went and I almost screamed as I saw his friend drive down a DO NOT ENTER driveway at airport (obviously he couldn't read it in English) and the friend said (in Spanish) "Gee, I don't know why this always happens to me every time I try to come down this ramp" (horns were blowing, people were shouting, etc.). By some miracle, we made it from Houston Intercontinental Airport to a downtown restaurant of Guadalajaran food (Nando felt he should treat his friend and I for lunch). After lunch, his friend drove us to the hotel. What I immediately liked about Nando was that although he had paid for my airline ticket and hotel....he expected NOTHING in return. He was concerned about me eating dinner, and suggested we meet at the Denny's downstairs for dinner.
I spent 4 wonderful days in Houston - he took me (by bus) to the Zoo, to various restaurants, flea markets. We really liked one another as friends - I felt I could tell him anything and vice versa. And I liked that he never once felt "entitled" to sleep over at the hotel WITH me.
I went back to Florida and gosh did I ever miss him. The feeling was mutual. We called one another 2-3 times a day (people, this was PRE-phone-card days!!) and ran up (each of us) a phone bill over $300-$400 monthly. We HAD to do something; couldn't go on like this. At the time my Mum was alive and I asked her if she would move with me to Houston - Nando was willing to pay to relocate us there (me AND Mum) and quite frankly, having been raised a City Girl in Colombo - I really loved the thought of moving to Houston. But....my Mum would not even hear of it....she said quote-unquote "I will DIE here in Florida!"
Since the Mountain couldn't come to Mohammed, Mohammed had to come to the Mountain and Nando left his stable life in Houston to come to a really UNKNOWN life in Florida.
I couldn't find a place to put him up (for SURE my Mum would not even let him in the house let alone put him up), so I had two lesbian friends who had a spare room to rent and there went Nando. About 6 months later we married, but did so secretly because my Mum was so much against him - never gave him a chance, really. So - we married at the court house and Mum's busy-buddy friend called her immediately "did you KNOW your daughter got married????". Nando and I moved into a really nasty rat-and-cockroach-infested apartment after we married but it was all we could afford - we could not move in with Mum as she wouldn't tolerate him.
ANYWAY - this is a long story (personally, I prefer the TEA BASKET story of Sri Lanka!) - we are now married over 17 years and during the last years of my Mum's life - she not only accepted Nando, but almost wouldn't eat unless he was present. More stories to come!
No comments:
Post a Comment