I now comprehend why parents and grandparents don't.....

I used to wonder WHY parents and grandparents (especially of newly immigrated or those whose parents could not speak English very well) refused to tell their kids "no" or grandparents.

I should have guessed it already, having devoted over 8 years of teaching English (free) to migrant workers in Central Florida.  The parents/grandparents feel quite POWERLESS (which is why I tried to teach English)...their children and grandchildren grow up speaking ENGLISH.  I met a really cocky little 9-year old whose Mum and Dad I was teaching English.  I said "Hi Patricia" (because that was the name her Mum had told me for her daughter).  This child turned, scowled at me and said "MY NAME is NOT PATRICIA - it's PATTY, got it???"  I was not about to have a 9-yr. old put me in my place, so I said "Oh, PATTY, I wasn't speaking to you anyway - I want to speak to your Mum".  "Well, my Mum CAN'T speak ENGLISH, so either I TRANSLATE or she doesn't understand!".  In quiet, yet perfect Spanish I told Patty "Mira - no me importa que tu Mama no habla ingles porque yo hablo español perfectamente.  No te necisito para traducir...te voy a hablar si ti necisisto, entiendes PATTY?"  (ROUGHLY: Look, it doesn't matter to me that your Mum can't speak English because I speak Spanish perfectly well.  I don't really need you to "translate"....I'll "call you" if I need you, understand, PATTY?)

The POWER and CONTROL these kids (even well into their late teens) have over their non-English-speaking parents is remarkable.  The parents and grandparents are so afraid to chastise their kids/grandkids...most definitely afraid to ever tell them "no" because the kids/grandkids have all the power. 

I know plenty of undocumented aliens here in USA - and in every case, their children (or sometimes grandchildren) are little "gods & goddesses" because the parents don't want to cut off their "translator chain".

UNFORTUNATELY, I've also seen kids who take advantage of this situation.  I know an 18-yr. old who SHOULD be a Senior in High School but is a Junior - he runs all over the city on his bike and his undocumented parents are afraid to say anything; he runs with some bad kids.

We can hope that each of us teaching English makes a dent.  It's a very sad situation.